The Road To There

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What's written in this post will be something that is close to my heart and that I hold on dearly to. 

This something has changed over the years and many valuable pointers were picked up at the same time.

This something has taught me how to control, cherish and live with minimal regrets.

This something is known as my way of loving a person. 

Ask yourself what matters the most

Only you can define what's important to you. When it comes down to it, you really need to ask yourself who is the most important person in your life? Devote your efforts and cherish her with your best efforts and sincerity. It's really that simple. Humans may tend to take each other for granted at times, but it must never be a habit.

Love for the person she is

Ask yourself what traits of her have attracted you the most? At the earliest moment could be her appearance but you know that is superficial. The bottom line is that never change the person she is. Instead, attempt to understand why would she does certain things - talk out the problems - thereafter, decide for yourself whether you can accept for who she is. 

Be grateful and realize constructive comparisons

To be grateful is to be appreciative of the things around you. Don't be shy to express how thankful and blessed you are to have her by your side. Remember that communication will bring the both of you closer. We may also tend to get complacent and too comfortable with our relationship at times, resulting in us thinking that others' are having better lives. This is where comparisons will be made - for example, other couples are enjoying so much more than us, the perfect family and so on - however, we do not really know what goes on behind the doors and that does not really matter to us as well. Just remember to flourish and nurture the bonds both of you have created always. 

The grass is not greener on the other side; it's greener on the side you water the most.

Have her back at all times

Sometimes, girls may be insecure for some unspoken reasons. Reassure her regardless of the circumstances. They may have spoken words that they do not mean just to test your degree of love for them through your replies. I will advise all the boys out there to not give up so easily if you really love her that much - just like how you would not give up on something you hold on dearly to. 

Be proud to have her

There's no need to flaunt your relationship as if you have won a big prize or trophy in a competition. Just admit that you have a partner and be ready to show her to your family as soon as both of you are comfortable with it. This gives her the impression that you're serious about this. Don't attempt to keep your relationship a secret without good reasons at all. 

Do not ever lie

In a relationship, do not ever lie to each other. Yes, the truth may be hurtful at times but what's there that both of you can't speak about? You are going to live your lives for the next few decades together. How difficult it may be at times, I believe that everything can be worked out - just that it requires more tact at times.

Be understanding and listen to her

I know this is known to everyone. However, we must constantly remind ourselves to understand before letting our emotions decide our actions. Be control of your own emotions and never allow it to affect your judgement. Yes, listen to your partner always - it may be tiny details and all, but this is what justifies good quality time spent. 

Prioritize her in your list

As we grow older, there are more responsibilities on our hands. It's inevitably true and so we have to deal with it appropriately. There should be a balance amongst your social circle, career, family and love. You have to decide what's more important and there will be one that ranks number one. That is life.

Discuss about the future

Future is full of uncertainties and imagination. It's always good to dream about goals and imagine the life few decades later. In my opinion, it is the best thing that you can always discuss with your partner about. Envisage the future together! 

Do not ignore her

Regardless of the circumstances, you should ever ignore her. Inform her that you're tired and need some rest right now and seek for her understanding. However, this should not be a habit or excuse that you should use everytime. Remember to end the call or conversation on a good note. 

Ask for her opinions

We tend to get carried away at times and forgotten about her opinions or feelings on certain issues. She will also understand your situation and carry on with your plans. However, do not make this a frequent occurrence as she will eventually feel a lack of respect and care for her. There should be respect between both of you afterall. 

There is no need need for anyone to tell you the special ingredients in a lasting relationship ...

There are many ways to love someone. If both of you truly want to stay together, you will find out the ingredients. On this last point, I would like to share with everyone that growing old is inevitable but growing up is optional. You are the author of your learning journey.